my journal

GUWWA

Global Underweight Welfare Association which was found on 25-10-2009 11:39pm
the founder, president, chairperson, cashier, attender, sweeper and the only member is my friend miss jose
according to her, the aim of this organisation is to promote malnutrition among working class women
the agenda is a death due to starvation every 3 weeks now and later, every week.
(i am her spokesperson)
here is what you should do:
1. tell your mom and friends that you are eating well.
if necessary, occasionally eat a full meal while at home, making sure everybody is staring at you
2. eat tapeworm and hookworm eggs twice a day; not b4 or after, but INSTEAD OF meals for better results
3. skip meals and eat only what looks diarrheogenic enough
4. stick to self cooking or hostel mess
5. keep your hair long and braided for that undernourished look
especially when your hair looks fatter than the whole you
6. most important step is to have really strong feelings for Somalian people
a good supporter stands the best chance to become the winner
7. work at least 26 hours a day 9 days a week.
if possible, find a bone cutter boss
8. do not eat vegetables or fruits even accidentally else you should get unnecessary micro nutrients that are harmful for the poor-half-a-pencil look you are trying so hard for
9. no boozing
alcohol clouds your senses and you might eat under its influence.
besides, most drinks are full of empty calories that will make you FAT
10. if you find yourselves invisible suddenly one day, report immediately to the chairperson. it means that you have reached your target, finally!
cart loads of gifts will be waiting for the winner!!
so hurry up!
you should bring a 1x1cm full size photo, biodata and Rs300000 for membership
package includes a self help guide to "lose weight and stay undernourished" by the founder
thank you
jai GUWWA
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